Thursday, 15 December 2011

On the Second Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave To Me...

Two Crazy Whores
And A Pair of Giant Matrix Boooooobiiiiiiieeeessss!

Warning: Major Spoilers Ahoy!

Despite having been hooked on anime for about seven years now, I had somehow avoided watching the uhhh... "gem" that is School Days. Eventually, this year, I bit the bullet and finally watched it, and holy crap, I don't think I've ever watched a series where I've hated the entire cast so damn much! Now, today's "Day of Christmas" I've called "Two Crazy Whores", but to be fair, only one of them is a whore *cough Sekai you dumb slut* but they're both certainly psycho enough! As much as I detest Sekai with every living fibre of my being, I can't help but admit that she was basically what ended up making the series. Had she not been such a complete tart, the infamous final episode would never have happened nor all the sexual exploits leading up to it. Instead it may have ended up as just another sappy school romance, but still, both her and Kotonoha are complete nutjobs.

How could you not eat my dinner?!
With Sekai it all starts out nicely enough. She learns of her friends crush and decides to help him. Then she falls fo him and continues to "help him" with kissing and eventually shagging practice until she fully steals him away. At this point, she's just a bitch and worthy of being pinned down in a half-nelson while being stabbed in the eyeballs with chopsticks. Then, after having given Makoto the sex-bug (and probably some kind of STD) and deciding that she's pregnant, that's where it all goes downhill. makoto being the arse that he is basically dumps the cow when he learns of her "situation" and apparently this is how Sekai deems fit to deal with it...

Why you no love me anymore? OMG you threw my dinner in the bin! *grabs kitchen knife* STABBY STAB STAB!

...

Yeeeeaaaaahhhh... 'cause THAT'S rational.


For the majority of the series Kotonoha is essentially everyone's source of pity. She fell for a guy, who hen dumped her and never told her about it, thus making her claims that they were dating seem like she's a pathological and deluded liar while balls-for-brains Makoto gets off scot-free. After deludedly refusing to believe that she and Makoto have broken up, Kotonoha seems to get more and more distanced from reality. Then Sekai does her nut and sends Kotonoha completely off the deep end.

OMG! He's dead! *sends text from dead Makoto to meet Sekai* You lie bitch! *grabs meat cleaver* SLASHY HACK SLASH! Told you. *sails off into sunset with severed head on a "nice boat"*

This bout of insanity you can at least see coming, but hell, action-reaction, people! Makoto was a dick, Sekai was a slut, but there's no way their actions warranted this level of WTF-ness.

Huh. So THAT'S what her innards look like.

Love it or hate it, you have to admit that School Days has managed to carve (sorry, no pun intended) a place for itself in anime history - but clearly not for decent storytelling. Frankly, this series made me angry, but it's certainly not one I'll forget in a hurry. What I can say in all honesty is that if my true love HAD given me these two for Christmas, I don't think he'd be my true love for much longer.

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